“Well hello, it is I, the 88th sexiest man in the world and you, yes you, you lucky bitch, get to carve me some ham.”

Rob is this week’s One Last Thing person in The Guardian today.

Mr Webb has been doing the solo rounds recently and the Have I Got News For You? that he presented last week is online so how could I not post it here?

I think we can say that was a success. More please!

So at this point, aged about 15, I was basically a revolutionary communist. OK, maybe it is obvious: there is such a thing as rebellion. But most of the other boys and girls at that school didn’t see any need for rebellion: it was a nice school and they were happy. I was happy too; I just also wanted to burn the place down.

Where were we? Yes, you introduced yourself and then I insisted on talking about politics. I’m so sorry, that was very boring of me. I’m glad it’s you, though. The guy opposite has that sweaty, embittered look about him that makes you think that he’d love to vote BNP but has only the bravery for UKIP. Let’s talk about him, shall we? Oh darn, I’ve run out of words again. Never mind, there’s always next week. He seems to be shouting rather vulgarly about “Britishness”, though. Who invited him?

I do so love Rob’s new(ish) column in the Telegraph, a place I never thought I would find anything I wanted to read. What a pleasant surprise.

From that most un-espionagey of all the spies aka Digital Spy:

Webb returns for ‘Let’s Dance’ final

Comedian Robert Webb will return for the final of this year’s Let’s Dance For Sport Relief.

The Peep Show star won the first series of the BBC One talent show last year, when he recreated the dance routine to ‘What A Feeling’ from the film Flashdance.

Webb will be on the judging panel next week alongside comedians Jon Culshaw and Jack Dee.

Rufus Hound, Katy Brand, Kate Garraway & Richard Arnold, Debra Stephenson and the two best acts from this week’s heat will compete in the final on March 13.

Let’s Dance For Sport Relief airs on Saturday at 7.15pm on BBC One.

Well… Rob and Abigail won their episode of Mr & Mrs, hurrah! There are probably some clips on the official site but nothing has surfaced on YouTube yet so you’ll have to make do with my rubbish screencaps instead:

An “ooh” moment.

Mr & Mrs after the event.

Spot the (pingpong) ball.

A certain comedy actor who is not averse to taking his clothes off is involved in the cancer awareness nudityathon (with no penises of course) in the new issue of GT aka Gay Times, out next week (I was tipped off by a gay who must time travel):

You could buy the magazine (for the articles) or just give some money to Macmillan Cancer Support.

Rob announced on Twitter that the Webb/Burdess baby is now out and about and called Esme Elizabeth Webb so hurrah for tiny humans and that.

Peep Show is halfway through filming now and here’s a photo of Jez in a suit:

Jonathan Ross is such an annoying interviwer but I loved this bit:

The Poetry Season continues…
“I wanted to be a comedian, and the comedy I enjoyed wasn’t poetry, it was all telly. Writing poems obviously served a purpose, but I really wasn’t tortured. They were just something I did.” There’s an interview with Rob on The Times website.

From Radio Times:
My Life in Verse: Robert Webb
Friday 05 June 9:00pm – 10:00pm BBC2

Robert Webb goes on a journey to find out more about the poem The Love Song of J Alfred Prufrock and the poet who captured his imagination at a young age, TS Eliot. He returns to the Lincolnshire classroom where he first heard Prufrock and visits the school hall where he made his first forays into comedy, as well as travelling to Paris where he discovers that the young TS Eliot shocked his respectable American family by spending a year in the famously decadent city.

Rob won at dancing like a celebrity trannnie in a leotard! To celebrate, here are some things from the media…

Behind the scenes at Comic Relief, week one.

From The Sun:

TV’S Peep Show comic Robert Webb confessed he was inspired to go on Let’s Dance for Comic Relief — by cheesy X Factor singer Chico. The comedy star was fired up to take part after seeing the ex-stripper having such a good time on the box. Robert, 36, confessed: “I was watching the X Factor in 2005 when I realised I was jealous of Chico. It was the feed for the whole thing. I thought he had a good sense of humour and rhythm. People were falling over themselves saying, ‘this is marvellous’ and I was like, ‘come on, I want to do that’.”

Robert, in a leotard and fake boobs, had 8million viewers in stitches when he won his first heat of the series with his rendition of Flashdance, from the 1983 musical romance. He’s keen to get the leg-warmers back on for tonight’s final. He said: “I once had to dress up as a banana, so this was quite restrained and sophisticated! In fact, I was suspiciously quick to sign up to do the Flashdance. It is one of those films from the 1980s that people remember — and it comes with a free amusing costume. I didn’t mind wearing the leotard. I had a special dancer’s support garment under it to de-emphasize a gentleman’s profile. I also wore a fake bra with modest little breasts. I didn’t want a big bosom because Jennifer Beals, the original star, was only 18. I didn’t want to get too carried away. I didn’t want to be some grotesque parody of womanhood.”

Webb’s wife, comedienne Abigail Burgess, loved his outfit. He said: “She thought I looked funny, but helped make some of the costume decisions. She was like, ‘no, you must wear American tan tights, you can’t have sheer black. She watched me on TV in the heats but she’ll be coming to watch me live at the final.”

Robert — who has made a string of TV hits with comic partner David Mitchell, 40 — said the leotard gave him confidence to get through the act. He said: “It was pretty nerve-racking as the screens went up. I tried not to think how many people were watching. I was too busy concentrating on what happened next to laugh. It was easy to keep a straight face as it is acting. Besides, the character got me through the embarrassment of standing there half naked! It never crossed my mind to do a routine with David though. He won’t mind me saying that he’s no born mover.”

Robert also revealed how he nearly threw up while in training because he’s so unfit. He confessed: “I rehearsed for four and a half days and it was massively tiring. There was definitely a lot of panting and sweating in the rehearsals! I am massively out of shape. This has been tough.” He said he didn’t think he’d make the final, but now he’s there he’s keen to win. “I’d love that,” he added, “But I think it’s going to be much harder. The pressure’s definitely on.”

And what about volunteering to go on Strictly Come Dancing? “Oh my God, no,” he said. “I don’t want to do any more dancing in public. Anyway, Strictly take ages.”

Rob and David laughing about David’s premature aging in the Sun article. Or something.